Mao's Beijing on the Güaire: the Grand Chavez ballet company

It looks like chavismo will never run out of idiotic ideas. Yesterday we saw how we paid for them with oil prices plummeting. Today journalist Andreina Marquez (@mintina)  attended a ballet performance.  Words fail common sense....  Here are some of her tweets.

Ballet de Arañero a Libertador pic.twitter.com/8QLH0KSMB9
— Andreína Márquez (@mintina) November 29, 2014

Nothing better to start the week but a little bit of chavista blasphemy

In the "believe it or not" series. We learn today that chavismo has created its own prayer to Chavez. Let's start with the crossing.

TEACH YOUR CHILDREN HOW TO CROSS THEMSELVES AS CHAVISTAS
In the name of Chavez, Maduro, and the sovereign "pueblo", we shall live and win
NOW TEACH THIS TO YOUR LITTLE FRIENDS

And then with a new and improved prayer to the Lord, the lord Chavez that is.

Chávez siempre fue un reaccionario

Siempre pensé que la seudo revolución bolivariana era en el fondo un movimiento reaccionario. No me esperaba encontrar en el aeropuerto de Valencia una prueba clara y sencilla.

Waiting for your bags in Valencia

I am back home and I wanted to finish my little chronicles of a holiday that was not.

To understand how degraded Venezuela is, travel by plane....

Registration under Chavez

I left for a short holiday to Margarita and truly, it is an awesome experience. Not for the adventure, good food, beautiful scenery, but for the lousy service, the degraded infrastructure, the lack of basic items such as milk....  So there, a little summary.

It all started with the difficulty in finding a plane ticket. In Venezuela now, if you want to have a choice of travel dates, you need to buy a month ahead, even in low season, which is my case. By trying to get my ticket with barely three weeks notice, I could not find the adequate dates and I lost one day of my "package" while having to pay the full price anyway.  Not to mention the aggravation of useless web pages of Venezuelan airline companies which forced me in the end to go to an agency....

Proof that Chavez was a reactionary

But I got my ticket and on the set day I went to Valencia to take my flight.  To decorate this entry I have a collection of the airport political propaganda that I had to endure while at the airport: I had to be there two hours earlier to make sure I would not be bumped for a "waiting list" and my flight was 1 hour and a half late without any explanation. Click the pictures to enlarge for details.

The IAEPHC is born. We may finally start understanding something of the twisted mind of Chavez

Hefty, hefty.....

In the "you cannot make up such shit" section, today Maduro signed the decree to open the Instituto de Altos Estudios del Pensamiento de Hugo Chávez, or for you Spanish speaking impaired people, The Institute for Higher Studies of the Thoughts of Hugo Chavez. And no one else but his older brother could be fit enough to direct it.

Let's start by saying that the work is going to be epic. Not because Hugo Chavez left a body of work worth analyzing but because he did not leave anything written except for a few newspaper columns and some letters. What Chavez is leaving are hours and hours and yet more hours of rants. Though "rant" is not a good description of Chavez speeches, the French "déblatérer" would be better, describing abundant and violent speech against something. But I digress.

The Post Chavez era of propaganda

Having an arepa at my occasional hangout in San Felipe I was forced to read Ultimas Noticias as the last "national" paper still available. And I fell on this so telling regime propaganda that I could not resist to take a picture of the full page advertisement and deconstruct here for your pleasure. Click to enlarge.

Let's start by the obvious: PDVSA, the state oil company is paying for that advertisement to glorify Chavez by attaching it tot he memory of Simon Bolivar, on the week of the anniversary.  Of course, if Chavez was born late July it could nto be possibly for any other reason but to his link to Bolivar. Take that you other Leo babies! At any rate, PDVSA breaks the law but who cares at this point....

The ghost of Chavez over the Venezuelan fleet

Today is the birthday of Bolivar, and as a happy coincidence for some parties, the victory of Maracaibo lake which was the last "battle" fought against Spain for independence. Thus it is also the navy's day. We got a never ending cadena for idiot political speech and an even more idiotic naval parade. Among other things we could verify that indeed we have more admirals, vice admirals and counter admirals than serviceable battle ships. The naval parade had to include peñeros to bulk up some...

Normally I would not watch it but I was lazy in my hammock enjoying the fee afternoon and waited to turn off TV. When suddenly I saw Chavez ghost...  Thus I grabbed my camera and made this 30sec clip for you....

Chavez trek

They placed Chavez in the old barracks turned Military museum. The S.O. went. It is a trek  you need to go through rather bad neighborhoods, or go up a steep staircase. And when you reach the place  you cannot take pictures anyway. Yet, there are some pictures on the way to the museumified Chavez.

Visiting the Chavez mummy (or whatever it is they are doing with the body)

The S.O. went today to inspect the surrounding areas of Los Proceres, the ceremonial avenue that leads to the military installations where Chavez body is on display  He could not access the inner sanctum even for some photos only: for that you need to make the whole line, that starts from the bus station of La Bandera and snakes through Los Proceres until the end. So he told me he will try tomorrow morning early. Meanwhile we get quite a few scenes....

We start with a "panoramic" of three pictures of the line, about half a mile still from Chavez. Note that it is a dry, dry season and the trees have few leaves to offer shade.

Cry, my beloved country

That is all that is left to you.

Today has to be one of the most awful days that we have had since El Surpemo reached power, and there have been quite a few of those dreadful days. Maybe today we need only miss those scores that crime targets every day, every single day. After all, the only death that mattered to us all has taken place two days ago. But what we lost today was any pride that our forefathers ever tried to build for us. Today is the final triumph of the  vulgarity that chavismo is and wanted us to become.

The beloved leader of the masses, of those at least that are waiting in line for hours under the sun to see him dead, will be embalmed and displayed as a trophy in an anachronistic museum, to serve of lightning power rod to the mediocre thugs that are attempting to retain office at any cost, and any ridicule.

The mediocrity that would be had waited for their island master to arrive today and pay his respects, and settle the succession. The Constitution has thus been violated further, unrecognizable even by those who wrote it. I never liked that Constitution but I think it deserved better fate than toilet paper. The victims, but idiots nevertheless, stand in line praising the winning leash while mourning the old one.

The wake was prolonged for 7 more days, where it is expected that the country slows to a grind so that the new masters can secure everything and get rid of whatever they dislike. After all, they are counting, they explicitly said so, on the discretion of the independent voices during the long wake to be able to complete their deed in the dark.

We are left to cry, to help drown our decency pangs.

Then and now: those Orwellian moments....

Readers will surely remember the picture from the La Planta jail in Caracas, smoke billowing out, sent by a reader (dodging the occasional "lost" bullet)..

La Planta aflame in tear gas, from a reader's window

Well, the same reader sent me a current picture where you can appreciate that the walls have been covered with giant posters of the beloved leaders. Mote the exquisite details on how the support columns have also been painted in red.

Renovating La Planta

In such ways is history rewritten. What was a jail riot where inmates had enough weaponry to hold off the army, where the incompetence of the jail minister was exposed crudely (she had not been able to even manage to put a director in a couple of months or feed them for that matter), where the "solution" was to allow inmates to go, un-cuffed, to the jail of their liking (with drugs and cash), where surprisingly no weaponry of significance was recovered is now set as a bright example on the prowess of El Supremo who recognized he negotiated personally with the inmates he could not control.  Then again, it was a meeting of the minds, a negotiation of pairs, of course.

Orwell would have had it this easy.

Chavez at our Lady of Coromoto: an essay on moral turpitude, part 2

In philosophy or ethics we can discuss morality, immorality and amorality.  Immorality implies knowledge of morality and thus the possibility of sin and repentance (even if it rarely happens).  Amorality may imply ignorance of morality whatsoever, or the outright rejection of the concept of sin (and hence repentance).  When I look again at the videos of Friday's visit of Chavez to the shrine of our Lady of Coromoto I am at a loss as to what to use for Chavez, immorality or amorality; or perhaps look into coining a new term to express what I am about to show you (though the simpler term "circus show" could also be quite acceptable).

Chavez in heavens/paradise (lapsus brutis from the Nazional Guard?)

This one will have to be listed in the chapter of "truth is stranger than fiction".  Click for full effect.

Tal Cual regales us with this recent painting that has been hung in the Nazional Guard headquarters of the Andes region (San Cristobal).  Besides the obvious, that we do not know exactly whether Chavez is in heavens or paradise (same difference for many), we cannot help wonder if it is not a classical betrayal from the sub-conscious of the Nazional Guard in charge as to the coming demise of Chavez.  Still, for fun, let's do a little art criticism, or deconstructionism if you will, to try to understand whatever is going inside the strange neuronal connections of these people.

Medical malpractice or succession wars?

Readers know that I have refused to indulge in useless Chavez cancer guessing.  But the issues keep raising more and more and Chavez has become that lady that protesteth too much.  The latest installment in the saga is so weird that I had to report on it in spite of my better judgment.

The thing is that there is that Dr. Navarrete, a surgeon in a private clinic in Caracas with a respectable resumé.  The guy was called, which is normal, to form the regular presidential team.  That was pre 2002 and he was the lone chavista in the team according to him (was he the implied leader?  he does not tell).  From these years he retained many items.  (Three that marked me).

Chavez familiy time

With a hat tip to P.B. I cannot resit posting this little video of a convalescing Chavez (?) surrounded by his family (in particular his Mommy dearest).  You do not need to understand Spanish to get the pathos, the depression of Chavez and the personality cult that surrounds him to the point of posting on the web such a silly and even inappropriate video, titled in all simplicity "Chavez family encounter".

Chavez croaking? Well, maybe.....

UPDATED (twice).   Yesterday I was dismissing the situation of Chavez extended absence as at least part showmanship; but today I am forced, courtesy of a post from Gustavo, to rethink that things might be much, much worse than I thought.  I do not know how trustworthy is Gustavo's source, but the thing is that his "conspiracy theory" matches so many things so well that, that as Italians would say, si non e vero, e ben trovato.  And thus, even if this blogger is always reticent on reporting rumors, for once he will make an exception.

In short, Chavez would be suffering from a prostate cancer that has metastasized.

Does the Bolivarian "revolution" respect Bolivar?

The answer of course is NO. The pseudo revolution might venerate Bolivar, adore him, deify him, but it does not respect him.

Charlabamos con el Presidente Chavez and other misteps of Cristina "cocotte" Fernandez de Kirchner

Yesterday was as bad as one could fear it would.  A monstrous military parade was used to celebrate a most civilian event.  All was late on schedule, all was designed to please Chavez, including him wearing his new disguise of a special military uniform.  El Tiempo de Bogota gives a deserved review of the day, Colombians not being able to even respect Venezuela yesterday.  Heck, Venezuelans did not even respect themselves, why should El Tiempo do it?  this was not Venezuela day, it was another step in Chavez personality cult with the usual hanger-ons paid for (though one wonders what was Leonel Fernandez of Dominican republic doing there?)

The speech of Argentina's president was as vapid and out of place and context as one could be afraid it would.  As a cheap Peronista of mafia like agreements with Chavez she certainly did not disappoint Chavez.  She spoke of all but Venezuela, and some of her rare historical comments were actually historically wrong.  What could you expect from a woman who in such an historical occasion says "we were chatting with President Chavez".  I mean, you certainly were at some point during the day but you do not say that at the tribune of the National Assembly of the country when you are the controversial keynote speaker of the momentous day!  But that is exactly what Chavez wanted, trivialization of the 19 de abril and people like me wasting time on the woman that Manuel Caballero justly nicknamed "cocotte", in French a silly woman that pretends to be as elegant and perfumed as possible.  It is also a double entendre as "cocotte" means stink.  Indeed, what we saw yesterday was the stench of failed leaders but successful thugs trying to find together new justifications for their hold on power at the expense of their people.

Updated: read the Simon Boccanegra today.

Oh Dear....

Tal Cual cartoon today

Chavez: Whoever has a personal agenda cannot be a revolutionary (note: proyecto in chavista-speech is so loaded with meaning that translation with agenda can convey it only partially.)
Some guy in the small crowd: with you everything, without you nothing (note: Spanish mistake, sintigo, deliberate by the artist)